Sunday, 07 June 2009

• my first love

  Whenever I feel lonely and wanting, God never fails to comfort me. He's my ultimate source of joy, life and peace.

  I've been feeling so depressed lately. I asked God why am I feeling this way for him. There were times when I just break down and cry. Last Friday, I was praying and asking God to take away this feeling for him.

  Why God? Why are You lettting me feel pain? Can you just make him disappear in my memory? Can you just temporarily turn off that emotion? I can't seem to control that emotion, I feel terrible.

  And today in the middle of worshipping God, I felt His strong presense. It was so strong that I couldn't stand it. I was shaking and crying just like a child talking to his/her father. He's love is amazing. I was longing for a different kind of love, but His is incomparable. It's perfect. He's my everything, my father, my friend, my lover.

  I'm falling in love again with my first love, my Jesus.

  I think that's what God desires for His children. For us to be in love over and over again. To desire more of His presence in our lives. To have fellowship with Him.

  God, thank you for making me feel loved. I may have so many questions today and I know I'll get those answered at the right time, Your time. I'll keep holding on to You, to Your words, to Your promises. Thank you for loving me even though I don't deserve it. I'd be lost without You, Lord and I couldn't imagine myself without You. I love You not because of what You've done but because of who You are.

   

   

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